The footer on my van’s website is green now.

This is not a development that should require much of anyone’s attention. It did, however, require mine.

There was the question of which green. Then the font size. The spacing. Whether the little illustration of Petal at the bottom was in the right place.

At some point, I realised I’d spent a considerable amount of time working on the bottom of a website that wasn’t finished.

I wanted more freedom. That was part of the reason I changed how I live and work.

Not freedom from doing things. I like doing things. I like working, creating, solving problems and getting involved in projects.

I just wanted more control over what those things were, when I did them and where I happened to be.

So I started building a website.

Then another website, specifically for Petal.

There are videos to make, stories to write, a podcast to record and edit, and a travel-planning tool I’m developing because apparently travelling in a van wasn’t quite enough of a logistical exercise on its own.

There are also business ideas.

Several of them.

And somewhere in all of this, I still need to earn a living.

I wake up in a van, often somewhere beautiful, and start making a list of everything I want to accomplish.

Then I add training. A walk. Groceries. Laundry, occasionally. Finding a gym with showers. Deciding where to sleep.

The list is usually longer by lunchtime.

She’s right, which isn’t particularly helpful.

The strange thing is that I enjoy most of it.

I like building things. I like seeing an idea slowly turn into something real. I like sitting in Petal with my laptop and working on something of my own.

I also like the freedom of being able to close the laptop, open the door and go for a walk.

It’s just that I don’t always do the second part.

Sometimes I’ll spend an entire afternoon somewhere lovely, adjusting things on a website. By the time I look up, the light has changed and I realise I haven’t actually been outside much.

I wanted a life with fewer obligations.

Apparently, I meant different ones.

I’m still figuring out the balance. How much to build, how much to work, how much to leave alone for a day.

For now, the projects keep multiplying. My to-do list has to compete with the places I came here to see.

The footer is finished, at least.

Now the website needs articles.